No More Mr. Nice Guy

Over the summer an empty lot a few doors down from my apartment turned into a construction site. Over several months, while walking past on my way to the T each morning, I watched as a handful of condos and pricey ($800K!) townhouses sprang up bit by bit, piece by piece.

I'm fortunate in that I have a pretty reasonable commute, all told. The highlight of the daily commute is my morning walk to the T. It's only eight minutes or so, but I love heading down my quaint neighborhood street, cutting through a nearby park, seeing little ones get dropped off at a day care down the block, and until recently, watching the progress on the new construction.

The timing of my commute coincides with the construction site workers morning coffee break. In the beginning, I didn't notice this too much. Here and there a few workers might smile and nod in my direction as I passed, but nothing more. About a month ago, with the exterior of the buildings completely finished, and the workers now gathering on front steps during their break, one man said good morning as I passed. I smiled, wished him a good morning back, and hurried on…thinking as I went that New Englanders really are more friendly than people give them credit for.

This routine of my morning hello with this one stepman continued each day, Monday through Friday. I didn’t think too much of it, honestly.He was always sitting on a step, reading the paper, sipping his coffee. We’d both just say hi and carry on with our days. It was a nice routine though, one the urbanite in me got a kick out of, a moment of a simple, kind gesture that I added to my list of commuting highlights. The guys working on the site, they know me, I thought. How neighborhood-y.

When I got home from my trip out to California a few weeks back, I scurried past the step man on my first day back to work. We exchanged pleasantries as normal and then he called out as I hurried on, commenting that I hadn’t been around the previous week. I smiled, called over my shoulder that I’d been on vacation, continuing on my way.

Last Friday, I walked past step man again, exchanged hellos, noticed him stand up as I walked past. "Can I walk you to the corner?" he asked.

Surprised, I nodded quickly - never breaking stride - "Um, sure?" I said.

So we walked the 1/2 block or so to the street. He asked me where I'm headed to each morning, where I had gone on vacation the week prior. I answered both his questions, quickly, surprised to be exchanging more than a hello. I stood on the street corner for a moment, looking left to check for cars before crossing. He started to turn back, saying quickly "well, I have to tell you, seeing you every morning is the highlight of my day."

I smiled, it seemed such a genuinely kind thing to say. "Oh, well, thank you." I called as I hurried across the street and on my way. It was a nice moment, one I thought about as I rode the T downtown. What girl doesn't like to be told they'd made someones day just by saying hello to them? They must be finishing work on the condos today, I thought to myself, and that's why step man decided to act as he did, to tell me I'd brightened his morning.

Still, I decided to walk a different route Monday morning. Route #2 isn't nearly as nice as my regular walk, but I didn't really want anymore run-ins with stepman on the off chance the crew was still working there. I'm not naive. It's one thing to have a man randomly tell you you made his day, quite another if their motives aren't as innocent as you'd presumed. By Tuesday morning though, I'd convinced myself I was overreacting and decided I'd resume my standard route.

Sure enough, stepman was there taking his break with the rest of the crew. I walked by as quick as ever (if you've ever walked anywhere with me you know I don't exactly stroll no matter where I'm going...) and sure enough stepman walked away from his breakfast, asking again if he could walk with me. "To the corner?" I called over my shoulder as I continued walking.
"Well, yes." stepman said as he broke into a trot to catch up with me.
"I'm running late."
"Yes, well, how was your weekend?"
"Fine, thanks. Nice weather we're having."
"Yes, it is."

He and I walked in silence for a minute, I came to the cross street, looking left for oncoming cars.

"Look," he said. "I realize there's probably a bit of an age difference here. "

I raised my eyebrows, nodded. (If I were to guess I'd put him in his mid 50s.)

"Well, I just want you to know that I like walking you to the corner because I think you're a beautiful woman, okay? I don't see you as a niece or a goddaughter or something like that."

I nodded, completely taken aback and internally praying that one of these cars just STOP already so I can cross the street and end this conversation.

"So, what I'm saying is I'm not your Uncle." stepman continues.

"Um, well, okay." I say, laughing. Because I always laugh when I find myself in nervous, awkward situations that my brain is trying to process. "I gotta go. Have a good day."

"Next time, maybe we can exchange phone numbers?"

"Um, well, maybe."

Jesus, I think. I'm going to walk in front of a car regardless if it stops just to get out of this conversation.

Luckily, a car does stop and I scoot across the street to the park, muttering oh man under my breath every step along the rest of my (used to be peaceful!) walk to the T.

Now. I realize what I should have done, and that is immediately nip this in the bud while standing on the street corner by saying any of the following:
-- "Oh, I'm flattered but I actually already have a boyfriend."
-- "Wow, that is nice, but it's very creepy to hear you explain to me that you're not my Uncle."
-- "Um, I appreciate the sentiments, but you do realize you're old enough to be my father, right?"
Or, a personal favorite:
-- "My God! This is why no one in New England talks to each other! A simple hello gets me HERE?"

But instead, seeing as I was completely caught off guard, I awkwardly stumbled my way through the conversation and offered up none of the above lies - or - hell, truths.

Eventually I'm going to have to make the walk down my street and tell him "thanks, but no thanks." There are few things I hate worse in life than conversations like that though, and I avoid them like the plague...so it seems, for the time being, I'll be taking the other louder, less quaint street as I walk to work for the foreseeable future.

At least they're not doing any construction there.

Yet.