Stuff.

At the end of last year, I read Marie Kondo’s best-seller, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up.  Whether or not you’ve read it, you’re likely familiar with the general idea behind it – keep only those items that spark joy.

Her advice is to pull out all items of a certain category that you are going through to declutter (i.e. you literally gather every single sweater you own and go through them one by one deciding whether each one sparks joy).  I tried her methodology with my t-shirts first, dumping each and every one I could find onto my bed one night after work…and then, after an hour or so, realizing I was getting tired and wanted to crawl into the very spot that was now covered with piles and piles of cotton t-shirts. Instead of feeling rejuvenated as I sorted, I began to feel frustrated and annoyed, ready to just put everything back where it had come from and call it a night. Decluttering be damned.  My own humble opinion is that her suggestion is a great idea in theory, but I quickly came to the conclusion it was one that I’d be better equipped to try if I had a second bedroom or spare area to do my piling and sorting. It is challenging advice to follow in a one-bedroom apartment, where my queen sized bed is the best and only place in which I have found to pile my clothes. 

And so I have put my own unique Kelli spin on this decluttering and tidying up goal of mine.  I am sure if Marie were reading over my shoulder she’d tell me that my way is the easiest way to fall back into old habits, that it isn’t a cure-all, etc.  But then I like to think that I would show her the five trash bags of gently used and worn items I just successfully dropped off at the thrift shop the other weekend and she and I would agree to disagree.  Instead of piling all of my items at once and sorting through my clothes and other objects in one fell swoop I find it immensely helpful to just think about each item as I am either contemplating wearing it for the day or putting it away from the laundry pile.  It probably takes more time overall and I know I only get through items one by one, but for now it seems to be working.  

I have a terrible habit of buying more clothes without purging old ones and this new way of looking at items has somehow helped me determine – really decide once and for all – if an item is outdated or uncomfortable or simply doesn’t bring me joy.  There’s got to be some science behind this type of question, because that’s the one that really helps me make a clear decision if I should keep or donate a variety of items.  In the past it was easy to convince myself to keep, say, an old sweater because “it might come in handy on a lazy weekend or maybe I could take it to the office and keep it in my desk drawer if I get chilled.”  The excuses were endless.  Now though, I find I’m able to take a long hard look at something, admit to myself that I never really liked it or the shape and cut is so 2005 or it’s too damn itchy to be comfortable and part with it without guilt. Onward it goes.

I don’t know what exactly encouraged this shift in thinking beyond her book and I fully admit I still have a long way to go.  Something hit me at the end of last year though when I realized I suddenly just felt overwhelmed by stuff.  So I’m working on it. I feel better decluttering a few pieces at a time; I walked away lighter after I dropped those recent items off at Goodwill.  I’d put myself on a spending/clothes shopping freeze too, given I must make more room in my closet before I can attempt to fill it again. (Which, yes, nearly killed me given post-holiday January sales, but I survived.)  In the end what I really want to accomplish is to make room for the things I truly love and that bring me joy, bidding adieu to the clutter, the distractions, and the unnecessary noise.